Wedding On The Cards

It turns out that I am getting married next month. See the countdown on the right in web version.

All of my friends find this news a little difficult to digest. I think I am one of the reasons for this. I kept this news secret from most of them and when they directly receive invitation they get surprised. Many of them feel its not my decision, I am being forced by my parents. I will answer this in FAQs below. Even if I wanted to tell some of them, I could not meet them in last few months. After switching to this new company I have worked either from home (Amroha) or Bangalore office.

Another reason for their indigestion is that I am the first guy in our college group who is getting married. Everyone had this Bollywood thing in mind that weddings are some form of extravaganza lasting a few months. But it doesn't work like this in our culture. They are generally a private affair in which the family gets more involved. I must confess, in my case, because of living away from home the Groom's friends and he himself had missed even those preparations in which there was a chance to get involved.

There are a few questions which most friends asked me when they heard the news. I felt rather than giving all of them different answers I should think and create a list of answers so that I don't get confronted when they meet me/each-other on the wedding day. Below are some of the Frequently Asked Questions:

Q: Are you being forced by your parents?/Are you sure you are doing this?
Ans: Yes, like all arrange marriages it was initiated by parents, they asked me the Wedding question and found the Answer for me as well. However, it was me who took the final decision.

Q: Who is she?/Where is she from?/Her education?
Ans: Her name is Sana Aziz. She lives in Delhi with her family. She has a post-graduate degree in English literature from Delhi University. I have already posted how my mother found her here.

Q: Is she a working woman?
Ans: Yes, she works. But for herself, on her hobbies and not for money.

Some awkward questions:

Q: Show me her picture?
Ans: Come to the wedding, I will make you meet her/ You know her name, you are a computer guy, go and find yourself. :P

Q: So, our friendship ends?
Ans: I am not shifting to another planet. But you have to invite one more person in your party next time. ;)

Q: Did you invite him/her?
Ans: Dua kar de jab tera bhai bada aadmi ban jayega he will throw a big party at Taj for everyone / Unfortunately, even if I want to I cannot invite everyone but we definitely remain friends. :(

Please remember us in Dua.

Two Religious Men

This morning while waiting for my train on a cold bench at Amroha railway station, I observed something strange. A man wearing a white kurta-payjama, having well trimmed clean beard and a skull cap was running towards another man. The other man was sporting a big red tilak on his forehead and a beard. He was walking in front of me towards the other end of the platform wearing knee length saffron dhoti. By their looks it was clear that the first man was a Muslim and the second was a Hindu.

When the Muslim man came closer, I observed he was having a few coins in his hand. The other man wasn't begging but he looked poor, he was probably a saint. He gave a blank expression when the Muslim man stopped him. The Muslim man smiled and offered him the coins. He accepted them and smiled back. I was watching them curiously. Later, both of them moved on to their business.

I felt good after observing this inspirational gesture by a human for another human. I also felt that this is the idea of a true secular country, a Muslim helping a Hindu, and vice versa. I regretted that I couldn't capture that moment on camera.

I also tried to analyze why such a small and normal incident stirred me so much. I realized its because of the communal tension we are facing in India now a days.

Republic Day Breakfast

26th January 2013, 10:50 AM

     I looked at the wall clock in my room at home. That was the third time I looked at the clock. But this time I could not ask myself to go back to sleep for ten more minutes. I remembered Walida(My Mother) shouting from the other room several times since morning.

     “If you don't get up now, forget breakfast”, I told myself.

    Suddenly the thought of visiting all my uncles and aunts along with other relatives struck me. I was on my monthly visit to my hometown Amroha. Even if I am there for a single day I make sure I visit at-least my close relatives. 

     My father always says, “Talluqat milne-jhulne se hi qayam rehte hain”.

Moreover, if I come to Amroha and don't visit them, everyone complains.

11:05 AM

     I finally got up from my bed and moved to the other room.

     I greeted my parents, “As salamu alaikum”.

     Walid Sahab(My father) replied, “Waleikum as salam”.

Walida also gave a reply but I could not hear her words clearly.

    “Ali, itni der me uthe ho yaar”, Walid Sb added, concentrating on T.V wearing his spectacles.

    I moved inside and sat next to my mother and covered me with her blanket. She was busy watching Republic Day parade on T.V. I kept watching for a few minutes as if I was really interested.

     “He is the King of Bhutan”, I announced just to start conversation with my mother as soon as the focus came to the ‘Guest of Honour’.

     “Magar isne itna bada dupatta kyu lapeta hai?”,Walida asked. “Its their dress I believe”, I replied.

    And suddenly, powecut..!!

    T.V screen went black.

     "Ye log 26 January ki parade bhi nahi dekhne dete”, I said, trying to shift Walida's anger to the electricity suppliers.

     “In logon ko Eid, Bakra-Eid, Diwali, 26 January se kuch farq hi nahi padta”, she added angrily. 

     Although I was happy, I would get something to eat now, still I nodded in agreement. Ten minutes later she got up and within next ten minutes my breakfast was ready.

     By that time electricity supply was back. As soon as the T.V screen came alive. I spotted almost a dozen people on a single bike. And the voice in the background announced, “These are jawans of Indian army who hold the Guinness World Record for most men on a bike”.

     “Not all the tax I pay is being wasted. Atleast some of my tax is being utilized for creating a world record. But is this what the tax is really meant for?”, I thought.

     Then I took my breakfast to the adjacent room.

     Wasted some time browsing through some old pics on my laptop as I finished my breakfast. Rest of the day was spent meeting relatives and friends.

     I celebrated Republic Day eating my favorite breakfast. Meeting people who really love me. But I still wonder if this is the way we should celebrate this day.

One of my favorite teachers once told us to celebrate Republic Day by saluting and admiring the morning sun while its rising. But getting up early for office already makes me feel like a slave.

My Grandmother

I went to Amroha last weekend and met my maternal grandmother. I call her "Naani Ammi". After meeting her this time, I realized how special she is to me.

She is full of knowledge and experiences. I can learn so much from her. Earlier when there was no formal education the older generation was the only source of learning for humans. Even today they are the first ones we start learning from. When I met her, she was so happy. She put her hand on my head, that's how elders in Amroha bless their children.

We discussed how fast the world have changed in recent years. She told me, when phones were not there the popular form of communication were letters and the fastest mode was telegram. Even that used to take at least two days to reach. And generally people used them for informing about some miss-happening. They used to torn off a corner of the paper carrying news about someone's death. So, on receiving such a letter people used to have an idea about the bad news. I tried to tell her about some other developments in technology like online shopping and Google. Although she looked surprised however I doubt if she really understood everything I told her.

She invested whole life in her children. And she is really successful. She is the one behind my mother's all delicious recipes. She successfully transferred her values and culture to my mother, who is teaching me now. Even today she is completely self dependent and full of energy. When I went to meet her, she prepared coffee for me. When I was a kid, she used to tell me stories. I want to spend more time with her and gain some wisdom. But holidays in corporate world are very limited. :(

Mohalla Peerzada - A locality in Amroha

Peerzada is one of the many localities of Amroha. It lies in the center of the city. 95 % population of this locality comprises of muslims most of them educated including many engineers, doctors and lawyers. The locality is named so because the descendents of Peer Hazrat Shah abban Badar-e-Chishti(R.A) live here.

    Hazrat Shah Abban, a great sufi saint who came here from Kerman in Iran, esatablished his Khanqah and an adjacent mosque here. Even today his Khanqah exists and an annual "urs" is held here. He was given the name “Shah Abban” by his followers which means “Father of Kings(Sufis)" . He is the ancestor of Amroha's RIZVIS.

There are three mosques and four primary schools in the locality.

Some other important places:

Asad cable Network: 

         The largest entertainment network of the district. Its also an advertisement agency. The local NEWS channels NNI live is also broadcasted from here.

Ghaate ki gali :
         This is ghostly street in the locality which even today people are scared to cross during night. People claim to have seen and even followed by ghosts there.

AP Health Club:
         Its the most reputed gymnasium of Amroha. Altough the facility is available only for gents.

Khari Kuan: 

         It’s a famous landmark and can also be considered a sub-locality. ‘Khari’ means ‘Saline’ and ‘Kuan’ is ‘a well’ in Hindi. Actually the landmark used to be a well with saline water . It was filled later and now a transformer is placed on its top. This sub-locality is home of Amroha’s JAFRI community.

Season of Mangoes in Amroha

Amroha, my hometown, is known for its production of mangoes. Amroha is one of the largest mango producing districts of western UP. Even the name Amroha is a combination of two words 'Aam' and 'Rohu'. 'Aam' means 'mango' in English and 'Rohu' is a type of fish. Although I cannot differentiate 'Rohu' from other varieties of fishes but now I can recognize many varieties of mangoes. Even I wondered when Amroha is not on a sea coast neither it is on a bank of a river how come this place is known for fishes. Later I learned that the city was having many ponds on its outskirts where people used to catch those fishes. But now many of those ponds are dry and many were filled up for urbanization.

This summer,after years, I got a chance to spend my holidays in Amroha. The city is on a fast track of development. There are better roads, many new colleges and schools, a flyover and many new showrooms. Its the time of the year when the trees all around Amroha are full of mangoes. But no one can dare to enter any of the Mango orchards without permission because they are secured. As soon as u try to touch a fruit someone shouts from a mile away. And not just that ...there are trained dogs who provide security to these orchards. Actually these orchards, full of mangoes, attract everyone including robbers.

Being from Amroha the love for mangoes comes naturally to me. Even my Grandfather owned a mango orchard. But it wasn't of any profit and needed a lot of care so he sold it later. This season I had tasted many different varieties of mangoes. Amroha produce many of the varieties and many other come from nearby villages and districts in our market. One type of mango may differ from others in color, taste, smell, size, price or looks.

So in Amroha its not just about eating this delicious pulpy fruit. But about tasting all of its varieties also called “Qismaat”. Finding different varieties is not easy even in Amroha. There are only six-seven varieties like Bombai, langda, chausa etc. which are popular and produced in huge quantity. Rest of the other varieties's production is very low and most of it is exported, self consumed or gifted to relatives by the orchard owners. Even to buy some of the quantity that comes in the market u have to make an advance request and constant queries with fruit sellers. And also need to recognize what u are being sold because u can be easily fooled by the fruit seller.

But the effort is worth doing for “The King of Fruits”..!!

Read more abt the efforts and experiments, varieties and uses of mangoes in Amroha in the next post.

Summer Vacations

               I am having the least busy schedule these days. Actually our summer vacations are going on and i have nothing to do. Being in Computer Engineering Department we do not require to undergo industrial training which is compulsory in other departments. So i m spending time sleeping, playing games, watching movies and meeting friends. I m getting too lazy now a days more coz i am at home and get everything ready from clothes to food.

            Being the Placement Coordinator of my class i had to go for meetings in the placement office and may be its the only useful work i m doing this summer. Apart from this i had bought a new "Java book" but its lying as it is. I am supposed to learn java this summer because we have to build a project in the coming semester and even i m tring but opening book is like inviting sleep these days.

            I m enjoying this vacation more because i got them after a long tiring year of following deadlines and may be its my last vacations because my student life is ending(inshahallah) this year and people say that once u walk into the professional life it become impossible to have such long breaks.

           But i know only 15 days are left and the same monotonous life is starting after them where i need to follow limits, have to perform and be a part of marks grabbing system. But this time i need to be more serious because this year is the final one.

So looking forward to work sincerely in the coming semester so that i get some new and different challanges to face next year.

          But do not want to bear any tensions for atleast these 15 days and want to enjoy them to fullest.