No Cure For Common Cold

I again became a victim of 'common cold'. And like always I got irritated, Mummy asked me to visit a doctor and take some medicine. However, there are more well-wishers in my life now. Like my mother this new well-wisher I am talking about has a big say in my issues now. She is my wife.

Sana, who herself avoids medicine especially antibiotics, advised me to consume home remedy instead of antibiotics. I used to take 'a citrizine' whenever I had cold. I must admit that I am vulnerable to it, I suffer from cold every two months. This time I also decided to avoid medicine. As a result I am sneezing for last two days. But I am sticking to masala tea, coffee and Unanai medicine.

I decided to Google and what I found not only validated Sana's insistence on avoiding antibiotics but also revealed that there is actually no cure for 'common cold':

Antibiotics have no effect against viral infections or against the viruses that cause the common cold.[67] Due to their side effects, antibiotics cause overall harm but are still frequently prescribed.[67][68] Some of the reasons that antibiotics are so commonly prescribed include people's expectations for them, physicians' desire to help, and the difficulty in excluding complications that may be amenable to antibiotics.[69] There are no effective antiviral drugs for the common cold even though some preliminary research has shown benefits.

:Wikipedia (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Common_cold)

Why have a family and friends?

A video describing what addiction actually means. Also describes why it is necessary to have family and friends:

Wedding On The Cards

It turns out that I am getting married next month. See the countdown on the right in web version.

All of my friends find this news a little difficult to digest. I think I am one of the reasons for this. I kept this news secret from most of them and when they directly receive invitation they get surprised. Many of them feel its not my decision, I am being forced by my parents. I will answer this in FAQs below. Even if I wanted to tell some of them, I could not meet them in last few months. After switching to this new company I have worked either from home (Amroha) or Bangalore office.

Another reason for their indigestion is that I am the first guy in our college group who is getting married. Everyone had this Bollywood thing in mind that weddings are some form of extravaganza lasting a few months. But it doesn't work like this in our culture. They are generally a private affair in which the family gets more involved. I must confess, in my case, because of living away from home the Groom's friends and he himself had missed even those preparations in which there was a chance to get involved.

There are a few questions which most friends asked me when they heard the news. I felt rather than giving all of them different answers I should think and create a list of answers so that I don't get confronted when they meet me/each-other on the wedding day. Below are some of the Frequently Asked Questions:

Q: Are you being forced by your parents?/Are you sure you are doing this?
Ans: Yes, like all arrange marriages it was initiated by parents, they asked me the Wedding question and found the Answer for me as well. However, it was me who took the final decision.

Q: Who is she?/Where is she from?/Her education?
Ans: Her name is Sana Aziz. She lives in Delhi with her family. She has a post-graduate degree in English literature from Delhi University. I have already posted how my mother found her here.

Q: Is she a working woman?
Ans: Yes, she works. But for herself, on her hobbies and not for money.

Some awkward questions:

Q: Show me her picture?
Ans: Come to the wedding, I will make you meet her/ You know her name, you are a computer guy, go and find yourself. :P

Q: So, our friendship ends?
Ans: I am not shifting to another planet. But you have to invite one more person in your party next time. ;)

Q: Did you invite him/her?
Ans: Dua kar de jab tera bhai bada aadmi ban jayega he will throw a big party at Taj for everyone / Unfortunately, even if I want to I cannot invite everyone but we definitely remain friends. :(

Please remember us in Dua.

The Wedding Answer

It took my mother just a few days after asking me the Wedding Question to actually come up with another shocking revelation. While I was busy checking out the number of "likes" that my new facebook DP fetched, my mother interrupted and handed me a cup full of tea.
She asked me about the work I was doing. I said, "Nothing, just reading something."
She ignored me and continued, "We have found a girl."

I was still busy thinking if posting a new picture fetches more "likes" on weekdays or weekends. Within  seconds I calculated and concluded that posting on weekend is better. Then I took a sip and discovered how a perfect tea tastes like. I looked at my mother out of love. She raised her eyebrows. I realized she is waiting for my response about something she said a few seconds ago.

"What did she say", I tried to recall. "About something... a girl... she found a girl !" Suddenly, I put the cup down on the table.
I asked surprisingly, "You found a girl?"
She smiled and said, "Yes, this is what I just said."
I became nervous, "But you said it takes a lot of time to find a nice girl. Please take your time and find someone nice."
She smiled again and said, "Yes, it takes time. We had several girls in our mind and recently we heard about another girl. Your father and her father were classmates. We have known their family for years. We think she is perfect for you."

She told me about her family and education in detail. All that sounded good but I was not ready for such a news. I reminded her about the promise that they will not force me for marriage anytime soon. To which she replied that even they are not in hurry, it takes at least one year for preparation.

She called my younger brother, "Hamza, show him the pictures which they sent."
"Without my confirmation you even asked for her pictures," I was more surprised.
"You don't know anything, this is how it works. Just have a look. Isn't she beautiful. MashahAllah," her eyes lit up on seeing the pictures.
I looked at the picture with disgust, "Yes, she is. Do you want me to finalize her just by looking at this picture?"
She gave an angry look and added,"Its almost final. What else do you want to say? You know nothing. Actually, boys have no idea what to actually look for in a girl. Still you can tell me if you have any concerns."

In the next few days our parents set up a meeting and as obvious they liked each other. Few more awkward discussions, meetings and events later, everybody happily agreed.

This way I found my answer to the Wedding Question.  :)

Selfie Addiction And What Elders Think Of It

Image Source

After a recent family function, a discussion with Uncles and Aunts about the other side of family made me realize some funny things about our popular culture. I was already expecting the comments about how sleeveless and low cut dresses are indecent. There was much more to it this time.

Aunt 1, disappointingly : "I don't understand which type of people they are. The are all namuney."

Aunt 2 : "They don't even know how to get dressed for a wedding. One of the girls was wearing a dress made out of bed sheet."

Aunt 3 : "They are all mad. One girl was continuously taking her pictures herself. She was making strange faces. She even took pictures with her tongue sticking out".

I smiled. I knew she was talking about 'selfie'. It is obvious that my Aunties were unaware of the popular selfie culture like most other elders in family. Even I agree with them, taking too many selfies in the middle of so many people makes you appear insane. Especially if you are pouting, making duck face and sticking your tongue out.

Teri Yaad Aayi

        

Image Credit- Vinot

  

جب سکڑتا دیکھ کسی نے چادر اڑھائی، تیری یاد ائی-

جب کبھی کسی نے اچّھی چائے پلائی، تیری یاد ائی-

جب ہارنے کے بعد کی کسی نے حوصلہ افزائی، تیری یاد ائی-

جب پھٹے کرتے مے خدبخد ہوئی سلائی، تیری یاد ائی-

جب کبھی ڈر کے آنکھ کھلی اور کسی نےپیٹھ تھپتھپائی، تیری یاد ائی-

جب میرے بھلے کے لئے کی کسی نے میری پٹائی، تیری یاد ائی-

جب میری حمایت مے کی کسی نے دنیا سے لڑائی، تیری یاد ائی-

جب ہر ٹھوکر پہ کسی کہ لب سے "الله خیر" آواز آئ،  تیری یاد ائی-

جب بیماری مے دوا سے زیادہ کسی کی دعا عصر لایی، تیری یاد ائی-
جب کبھی کسی نے اچّھی بات سکھائی، تیری یاد ائی-
کبھی بے وجہ کبھی بے سبب بس یہیں، تیری یاد ائی-

- A poem dedicated to my beloved mother.

Next Big Event??

In last 23 years, I always had something in my mind. Something that was supposed to happen a year or two down the line. Something that was supposed to change my life, if not forever, for at-least the coming year. Something that needed preparation. In childhood it was annual exam. Later, it was admission to a good College. Then it was finding a nice job. But now I feel really strange. Now, I really miss that feeling. That feeling of some big upcoming event that can change my life.

There were new books to read and new problems to solve every year. New teachers, new classmates and new lessons. Now life is somewhat monotonous. There is nothing exciting in life for coming few years. Nothing that have potential to change my life forever. I realize I was getting everything cooked and dried till now. There were things that were already planned. School and College and all. From now on, I need to decide myself what I want to do in future. I am supposed to create those Big Events for myself.

This is strange. I never thought life can be like this. Although decisions are what make us humans different from Computers. But its really difficult. Is this freedom?? I will be responsible for my failures now. Even earlier I was, but I always have option to blame others or the system for the miseries of life. Parents and teachers were always there to decide on my behalf.

I have an option to kill few more years refusing to take a stand like others in my generation. Or, I can become socially awkward and criticize everything and everyone around. But I decide to choose the third option. Pretend to be confused. And ignore the fact that now I am responsible for my actions and even my actions can harm others.

Am I going through what they call “Quarter Life Crisis”??But I am happy. I just cannot choose. Am I turning into a Robot?? But ignoring everything is also a choice. I may be on self destruction mode but I have chosen this. Thank God! At-least I am human.

Humans cannot be happy or sad for a long time. The situation is going to change soon. Some disaster, disease or a girl (J) will strike soon. This time I will face everything unprepared. 

Republic Day Breakfast

26th January 2013, 10:50 AM

     I looked at the wall clock in my room at home. That was the third time I looked at the clock. But this time I could not ask myself to go back to sleep for ten more minutes. I remembered Walida(My Mother) shouting from the other room several times since morning.

     “If you don't get up now, forget breakfast”, I told myself.

    Suddenly the thought of visiting all my uncles and aunts along with other relatives struck me. I was on my monthly visit to my hometown Amroha. Even if I am there for a single day I make sure I visit at-least my close relatives. 

     My father always says, “Talluqat milne-jhulne se hi qayam rehte hain”.

Moreover, if I come to Amroha and don't visit them, everyone complains.

11:05 AM

     I finally got up from my bed and moved to the other room.

     I greeted my parents, “As salamu alaikum”.

     Walid Sahab(My father) replied, “Waleikum as salam”.

Walida also gave a reply but I could not hear her words clearly.

    “Ali, itni der me uthe ho yaar”, Walid Sb added, concentrating on T.V wearing his spectacles.

    I moved inside and sat next to my mother and covered me with her blanket. She was busy watching Republic Day parade on T.V. I kept watching for a few minutes as if I was really interested.

     “He is the King of Bhutan”, I announced just to start conversation with my mother as soon as the focus came to the ‘Guest of Honour’.

     “Magar isne itna bada dupatta kyu lapeta hai?”,Walida asked. “Its their dress I believe”, I replied.

    And suddenly, powecut..!!

    T.V screen went black.

     "Ye log 26 January ki parade bhi nahi dekhne dete”, I said, trying to shift Walida's anger to the electricity suppliers.

     “In logon ko Eid, Bakra-Eid, Diwali, 26 January se kuch farq hi nahi padta”, she added angrily. 

     Although I was happy, I would get something to eat now, still I nodded in agreement. Ten minutes later she got up and within next ten minutes my breakfast was ready.

     By that time electricity supply was back. As soon as the T.V screen came alive. I spotted almost a dozen people on a single bike. And the voice in the background announced, “These are jawans of Indian army who hold the Guinness World Record for most men on a bike”.

     “Not all the tax I pay is being wasted. Atleast some of my tax is being utilized for creating a world record. But is this what the tax is really meant for?”, I thought.

     Then I took my breakfast to the adjacent room.

     Wasted some time browsing through some old pics on my laptop as I finished my breakfast. Rest of the day was spent meeting relatives and friends.

     I celebrated Republic Day eating my favorite breakfast. Meeting people who really love me. But I still wonder if this is the way we should celebrate this day.

One of my favorite teachers once told us to celebrate Republic Day by saluting and admiring the morning sun while its rising. But getting up early for office already makes me feel like a slave.