Wedding On The Cards

It turns out that I am getting married next month. See the countdown on the right in web version.

All of my friends find this news a little difficult to digest. I think I am one of the reasons for this. I kept this news secret from most of them and when they directly receive invitation they get surprised. Many of them feel its not my decision, I am being forced by my parents. I will answer this in FAQs below. Even if I wanted to tell some of them, I could not meet them in last few months. After switching to this new company I have worked either from home (Amroha) or Bangalore office.

Another reason for their indigestion is that I am the first guy in our college group who is getting married. Everyone had this Bollywood thing in mind that weddings are some form of extravaganza lasting a few months. But it doesn't work like this in our culture. They are generally a private affair in which the family gets more involved. I must confess, in my case, because of living away from home the Groom's friends and he himself had missed even those preparations in which there was a chance to get involved.

There are a few questions which most friends asked me when they heard the news. I felt rather than giving all of them different answers I should think and create a list of answers so that I don't get confronted when they meet me/each-other on the wedding day. Below are some of the Frequently Asked Questions:

Q: Are you being forced by your parents?/Are you sure you are doing this?
Ans: Yes, like all arrange marriages it was initiated by parents, they asked me the Wedding question and found the Answer for me as well. However, it was me who took the final decision.

Q: Who is she?/Where is she from?/Her education?
Ans: Her name is Sana Aziz. She lives in Delhi with her family. She has a post-graduate degree in English literature from Delhi University. I have already posted how my mother found her here.

Q: Is she a working woman?
Ans: Yes, she works. But for herself, on her hobbies and not for money.

Some awkward questions:

Q: Show me her picture?
Ans: Come to the wedding, I will make you meet her/ You know her name, you are a computer guy, go and find yourself. :P

Q: So, our friendship ends?
Ans: I am not shifting to another planet. But you have to invite one more person in your party next time. ;)

Q: Did you invite him/her?
Ans: Dua kar de jab tera bhai bada aadmi ban jayega he will throw a big party at Taj for everyone / Unfortunately, even if I want to I cannot invite everyone but we definitely remain friends. :(

Please remember us in Dua.

Flying Towards Bangalore

I suddenly got up and started searching for my phone. I barely slept for 2 hours that night. I checked the time, it was 3:45 AM. I got up fifteen minutes before the first alarm out of a series of three was to start ringing. It was excitement and concern about my first air journey to a new city that gave me sleepless night. I got ready and boarded the cab I requested earlier that night for going to IGI Airport. My first checkin at IGI T3 was really smooth. I was amazed by the size of T3 terminal and the number of shops there, its like a complete shopping mall.

Source: Wikimedia.org

I would be lying if I say I was not at all nervous about the air journey. After boarding the aircraft initially I was very excited. It later turned into nervousness and fear once the aircraft hit the runway. I always thought an aircraft to be a very high performing, efficient and smooth machine. When it started running it made strange "khad-khad" noise and started trembling like an old bus. I doubted if everything is ok with it and if it can really take me to Bangalore safely. I found relief in fellow passengers on whose face there was no sign of panic. And by looking at the faces of Air hostesses with heavy make-up whose smiles were becoming more wider on every passing second, I convinced myself that its normal. As soon as the aircraft started flying the noise and vibration reduced. Within a few minutes things outside the window started to grow smaller as if someone is zooming out the view.

If you have ever used google maps you will not be very amazed by the view outside. It looks very similar to the satellite images when you do maximum zoom out. Its flying above the clouds that was breathtaking. On looking down from the window you realize there is nothing outside, its just one big white cloud expanded till the end of the sky.

It took us just 2 hours and 30 minutes to reach Bangalore.

The Wedding Question

"We are looking for a girl, for you", said my mother with her mysterious smile.
I knew they had a plan. Although my father was pretending to be completely occupied by newspaper, I knew they were waiting for my reaction.

That wasn't the first time I was dragged into such discussion. But the difference is that it used to be a question earlier. It was more of an FYI this time. I knew something has already been cooked. My earlier excuses are no more valid. The search is already on or maybe I am late to the party. It has already ended.

"For how long have you planned to remain confused?", I asked myself. I still wondered how can I so casually take such a big life changing decision. All sort of negative thoughts filled up my abnormal brain.

"Is it the right time?"
"Living with a complete stranger?"
"Is this how it works?"
"Privacy?"
"Freedom?"
"Life?" :)
"Heaven?" :)
 Many more weird things.

"We are not asking you to get married tomorrow. Even finding a nice girl takes time. Come on, be normal. This is how it works", she added very casually.

I talked to myself, "Be reasonable. You cannot run away from this any further. Bring on something concrete".
I knew all my past Google searches have made me more confused. No one in the world actually have an exact answer about my concerns. I knew this nervousness will turn out to be "very normal human behavior" later but I was not convinced by her.

And like always, I turned to Allah for help. However, I realized, I cannot expect straight answers to my silly questions from him. I knew when Islam comes into picture, I satisfy all the conditions for "nikah". These realizations made me reach the root cause. I ended up asking Allah to make my mother find someone who is best for me. I wanted to be a little specific but all I could add was "someone who takes me to heaven".

Somehow I felt better. And reluctantly I gave mummy a green signal.

It took her just a few weeks to surprise me with The Wedding Answer.

Chaiwala And His Curiosity

Few days ago a guy came to my place for delivering tea and parathas on my roommate's order. This thin guy who was about 18 years, got very curious about computers and we discussed several things.

"Bhai jab bhi me aaya hun yahan sab computer chalate rehte hain. Main sochta hun ise chalane se hota kya hai?".

I tried to explain with an example, "Dost, jab plane aasmaan me hota hai wahan raasta pata nahi chalta. Use computer se hi control kartey hain".

He got more confused. I tried one more time. "Mobile me jo game khelte hain vo computer per hi to banate hain".

"Achcha samajh gya". He continued with excitement, "Vo jo mobile me game khelte hain?". I nodded.

He added with  disappointment "Mere paas touch wala phone hota to main aapse game dalwa leta. Vaisa wala mobile haina usme chalega nahi".

I asked, "School jaate ho?".
He replied, "Bhai school to nahi jaata. Tuition padhta tha. Mere paas ek Bengali rehta hai. Vo tuition padhata hai. Bhut mushkil padhai hai uske paas. Jo bhi usse padh leta hai kaamyaab hai."

"Tum kyu nahi padhte?", I asked.

"Bhai time hi nahi milta. Yahan raat me 11 baje tak parathey banata hoon. Uske baad jaake so jaata hun. Kuch dinon me doosri jagah kaam shuru karuga. Phir padhai shuru karunga."

Few days later he again arrived to deliver tea. I had no idea what should I ask him. I do not wanted to make him feel low or disappointed.

While I was still thinking, he asked, "Bhai ye angrezi gaana baj rha hai kya?".

My recent favorite, Adele's "Someone like You" was getting played, so I replied, "Yes".

He looked at the monitor and asked, "Isme video nahi aata?".

I replied, "Aata hai", and played a hindi video song for him. 

Meanwhile, I found the common thing I could discuss with him. I asked, "Namaz padhte ho".

By this question he was not ashamed but he looked guilty. 

He replied, "Nahi aajkal to nahi padhta. Shaytaan bilkul peeche pad gya hai. Jab ghar se aaya tha to roz jaata tha. Ab InshahAllah ghar se aaunga to padhta rahunga".

When he was leaving I told him, "Dost 5 minute lagte hain padh liya karo. Aur humare liye bhi dua kar dia karo". 
He nodded in agreement and left.

The song which was playing:

Interstellar - The Movie Review

Interstellar is a science fiction adventure film directed by Christopher Nolan. The movie is based in near future when earth is no more habitable so NASA decides to send space travelers in search of new places which are able to sustain humanity.

Although, I was not waiting for its release, not even heard about it till the previous day. But I agreed to join my friends because I needed a dose of entertainment after a long and tiring day in office(on Saturday). I may not be following Nolan religiously but I am aware that his movies require a functional brain.

About the movie:

• This movie is the only application of "Theory Of Relativity", which I unsuccessfully tried to understand during engineering.
• Please learn the basics about Relativity, Quantum Mechanics, Murphy's Law and Universe before booking tickets.
• Even if you are not from Science background please participate in clapping after the movie. You can later justify that you loved the direction and physical portrayal of time.
• One of those movies which give you homework.
• If you are a Salman fan and watch movies only for Entertainment. Go to the same multiplex and watch "The Shaukeens" on the other floor. Later, smile at people who come out confused after watching Interstellar.
• Like a typical Sci-fi and Nolan movie, it too leaves many questions unanswered.

(Spoilers begin)
As explained by my friend Daud,the most interesting question is the loop. In the end, Cooper is able to save humanity by transmitting the message through Gravitation. But he transmitted the message from future to save humanity in the past. If he is in future, how could he survived the past. To make it simple, the question is who saved whom? Is it people from future who sent a message, saved their past. Or people in the past saved their future.
Who came first hen or the egg?

Last Few Months

Like every blogger who posts once a month, I also feel I should write more. Its not only about finding time. Also about the mundane life I am living now a days

Last three months:

In July, I moved to a new project in office which required more aggressiveness. During the whole month of Ramzaan I struggled with sleep and guilt of not utilizing the holy month. It was during the last week of the month when I took holidays and went home, I felt relieved. After coming back I again spent most of my time in office. Facing new deadlines everyday. At times its frustrating, however, there is this satisfaction that I am learning new things everyday. My capabilities were questioned which made be more serious and dedicated towards work. And it is going to continues the same way till November. Meanwhile, I am finding solace in poetry and music.
A recommendation:

I live in Jamia Nagar and I am not a terrorist

Its not very often that you read about your locality in a national newspaper unless you live near 10 Janpath. It wasn't about a minister's well publicized visit or an advertisement about a new Mughlai restaurant. Not even just any negative news about petty crimes. What attracted me today was a statement from a veteran leader belonging to a national party, claiming our locality is a terrorist's hub. "Jamia Nagar is a safe house for terrorists", he claimed.

This election season all politicians in India have made all sort of allegations against each other. But Mr Malhotra went a step ahead and blamed a whole community for terrorist activities. Such irresponsible and baseless statement in order to polarize voters on communal lines will only harm his party.

I was shocked to read that such a senior leader thinks like that. Claiming someone to be a terrorist is not a small allegation. This is complete "Identity Crisis" for us, in our own country. Such inflammatory remarks can create social unrest. A criminal case should be registered against him.

This Election season, for most people, it is so simple to choose anybody considering the issues like Development. It is we who also have to face and prove many other things.

Now, you can imagine what made me write this sher in my Ghazal:

Naujavaan hun mujhko behka do, ya dehshatgard keh ke phansa do.
Ilzaam koi sangeen lagao, be-gunaahi ke saboot bhi mita do.

Meri kamzooriyan maloom karo, aur unhi pe mujhko aazma lo.
Sitam se sar na jhukega mera, Zillat se mujhko hara do.

References:

• http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/India/Jamia-Nagar-Batla-House-terrorist-hub-V-K-Malhotra/articleshow/32685459.cms
• http://indianexpress.com/article/cities/delhi/congress-aap-slam-malhotra-remarks/

Irreversible Destruction

Photo By: ShineALight

It is so damn easy,
To fake happiness, to fool ourselves.

I sat there thinking if being happy is a sin,
Loosing control over my body.

Feelings were getting awkward,
with every passing second.

I felt too clothed among attractive,
Like a sole spectator among performers.

Music started flowing in my veins,
Heart pumped at irregular intervals.

Colorful liquids were served in transparent glasses,
and caused people to shake legs madly.

Yes, I surrendered,
not sure to devil or to my true self.

Koffee with Stars

Just now I watched two episodes of Koffee with Karan. All this while, when the show was off for years, I used to think that I was so immature earlier to choose it as one of my favorite shows on TV. I thought how can I get entertained with all the false information that stars give just for increasing TRPs of a show and earning money. But then that is how entertainment industry works. You should neither believe nor take anything to heart said over TV. I tried this and again it became my favorite show.

There are many things that one can learn from this show. One of them is how to answer most personal questions and insult people without actually acknowledging their name. One of the questions that I feel to answer now is "top three agendas of life". Without taking much time I found this answer:

• Career: Definitely, its always there in mind, all the time. I always wonder what I will be doing five years from now. Will I ever be good at anything? 
• Life after Death : This should be on top of this list. But I am too weak and get carried away with smaller issues everyday. This agenda is most important but most forgettable. Really need to set my priorities straight. 
• Wedding: Hmm.. Yes. Few of my friends are getting married next month and I am yet to meet someone I can think of spending my whole life with. This was always in top 5. Now in top 3.